Oh boy, finally it’s here. Finally it’s 31st December 2017! I cannot tell you how excited I am right now. I just want this year ends. I honestly think that 2017 is probably the worst year ever in my recent memory. I haven’t remembered so many years where I associate as a negative. Even when my grandmother passed away in 2005 or when I was unemployed for 7 months in 2015, I still had a positive memory of 2005 and 2015. But 2017 is just completely awful. Here are some of the most awful memories I had in 2017:
Basuki Tjahaja Purnama who is also known for Ahok by the public was jailed because he said it was okay for muslims to elect non muslims in election. His political enemies jumped on the hate speech and he lost the Jakarta 2017 election and was found guilty for religious blasphemy.
Ahok is the second chinese-christian governor and one of the few ethnic and religious minority who were able to reach one of the most important office in Indonesia. He is known for being unapologetic, transparent, and strong anti corruption stance. However he is also loud-mouthed and simply unapologetic. All of his supporters knew he would get a trouble someday because of his attitude, and we were right.
This event hurt every religious and ethnic minority in Indonesia because Indonesian society and the muslim people are are increasingly getting intolerant to the minority group. They like to think they are tolerant.
I literally cried in front of my pc when I read this news.
My wallet was stolen and the thief used my credit card without a pin!
This was the single event that occupy my mind in the past 6 months. My wallet was stolen when I had a date on 3rd july 2017, and my supposedly secure pin-enabled credit card could be used without a pin. I protested to the bank issuer, HSBC but they said, the regulation doesn’t comply any transaction with a pin. PIN is just an option, not a mandatory. WHAT THE FUCK HSBC!!?? My case is still unresolved. I am still disputing this to the regulator.
I got ghosted… again!
So I met this south african dutch douchebag on Tinder. He ghosted me for a while, and then he appeared again. I thought oh well, maybe he had a signal problem, so I gave him another chance to meet up. It supposed to be a casual meet up. But he hung out on me during the day. I was disappointed to myself because on that day, my co-worker invited me to come to her birthday. If I think about it now, I should have just ditched him and go to my co worker’s birthday party.
I sung this song for two weeks:
Later on I found out this guy had a motorbike accident and got 10 stitches. Thank you karma!
That aside, I have learned some things in 2017:
You cannot change your environment, your past but you can change your perception
My sis recommended me to visit a psychologist. I have been having 5 sandplay therapies in the past few months. The pyschologist said to me, I need to revisit myself so I can reconcile with my past and become a better person. I have been having a problem with intimacy with both guys and girls. Since there is a girl that really likes me and I actually like her too, I am not sure how to approach her because she came from a very functional family, I don’t want to share my problems with her. When I meet a person or any date or any potential romantic partner, the first question would be: will this person leaves me too? That’s why I prefer to keep everything platonic. I stopped hooking ups completely after my last hookup with a Swiss man in May. I found that hookup made me worse afterward.
Somehow, the therapy is starting to work and although it’s hard, I am starting to feel secure with her. However the prospect of marriage still makes me scary. She said she’s okay with a polyamorous relationship, but can it really work? As I watch more and more heterosexual romantic stories from korean drama, I feel confused whether I still need to date guys to be a bisexual. I feel like I can ditch homosexual dating world once for all but it will lead me to a non-stop self contradiction.
Recently I also met a guy and we clicked very well. Although we are still in friendly terms, I really hope we can work of something since my girlfriend in Singapore anyway.
Cryptocurrency makes stock like a ripple
Now this is probably one of the most interesting game changer for my financial target. After my wallet was stolen, I got angry to myself. I screamed. Unfair! unfair! Why must I lose money!? It’s not my fault!?
Well yes it’s unfair, but I found out people will always lose money at some point of their life because misfortunes or just being unlucky.
It took me a while to accept this reality. After I heard about cryptocurrencies, I jumped in and put 90% of my assets there. I thought to myself: what’s there to lose? I have lost money anyway!?
fast forward 6 months later, I actually exceeded my investment target. Okay, the volatility of crypto market is crazy, like super crazy. sometime you can win big or lose big. But it’s thrilling. it makes stock market volatility like a child’s play. My next milestone is to double my cash by the end of the next year. I hope I can be a winner!
I think that’s all I can write in 2017. Happy new year 2018!